Dumping

 

Weight loss has slowed but I have it on good authority that this is normal. After I'm healed, in about 4 weeks the fat should start to melt away.

Current weight: 14 9

Loss this week: 2lbs

Total loss: 1 11½

I also measured my fat percentage this week - 46% which is horrendous, and yet less than it has been. My highest being 50%. Let's not dwell, onwards and downwards.

Last Friday it was pointed out that maybe the soft foods had possibly been introduced a little prematurely. I tolerated it fine but it could be stretching my stomach, and we don't want that. So I went back to liquids - shakes and yogurt. I've slowly introduced food again in the last couple of days - mash, tuna, beans, cheese. I bought 500g of reduced blueberries and cooked them into a compote. It's delicious with my white chocolate flavoured quark. The amount I'm having at each 'meal' is about 100ml protein shakes or smoothy, or 60g yogurt with a tbsp of compote, or a tbsp of beans with 25g (¼ tin) of tuna with a little grated, melted cheese. It's all good, and these small amounts satisfy me. I eat it just putting the tip of the fork or spoon into the food, wee amounts, but it works.

One of the downsides of gastric surgery is something called dumping syndrome. Dumping syndrome is a group of symptoms, such as diarrhoea, nausea, and feeling light-headed or tired after a meal, that are caused by rapid gastric emptying. Rapid gastric emptying is a condition in which food moves too quickly from your stomach to your duodenum. After gastric surgery, it can be more difficult to regulate movement of food, which dumps too quickly into the small intestine. Eating certain foods makes dumping syndrome more likely. For example, refined sugars rapidly absorb water from the body, causing symptoms. Symptoms may also happen after eating dairy products and certain fats or fried foods. I think I experienced a little episode last week eating coconut yogurt. I needed to stop eating just a couple of spoons before I did, but it was so tasty and you think a tiny extra amount won't harm, but my body wasn't happy. 

O worksn my day off I decided to sort and clean our bedroom. Everything came out that was under the bed so Mark could hoover. When I get a book I put it beside my bed, in a 'queue' waiting to be read. The pile got bigger and half the books slowly went under the bed. I decided it was time to find a home for this queue, luckily Isaac's old bookcase had an empty bottom shelf (see picture). There were/are 28 books waiting for me to read! Goodness me. Hooray that I love reading! 

Would you like to see my healing holes? See below.

You can borrow my belief in you until you can find yours again.

Mashed/puréed

 

I forgot to include my stats last week - the most important thing probably...

A quick recap. Starting weight 16st 6½lbs, weight before surgery (after LRD) 15st 8lbs. Today's weight 14st 11lbs. Total loss 1st 9½ lbs. So far the LRD is winning lol. Typical

So another important rule (in my opinion the hardest) is no drinking 30 minutes before food, no drinking 30 minutes after food and definitely no drinking with food. Now I've moved to soft/pureed I'm having 6 small (tiny) meals a day, and I need to eat slowly and take 30 minutes to eat each tiny meal. So (quick maths) that's 1½ hours per meal x6 is 9 hours for eating! Then I need to get at least 1½ litres of fluid in, sipping, very slowly. There's just not enough hours in the day. I feel I'm constantly putting something in my mouth. And it's no longer chocolate! 

Currently having very exciting food (well compared to plain yogurt and protein shakes). Mashed potatoes, mashed beans, low fat cheese, egg, tuna, smoothies - but not all at the same time, but good to mix and match. Sometimes potato with beans or potato and tuna, or beans and tuna or egg and beans, all with or without a little cheese. Oh the joys. And I've discovered a great low fat, low sugar, high protein yogurt that's not even a yogurt. It's quark! White chocolate flavour is delicious. It's got a funny name but it's so good.

So we bought Bella a foraging mat. It has lots of fabric 'leaves', see picture, that you hide treats in and she has to find them. She was loving it but half way through she realised she could grab the corner with her teeth, lift it up and shake her head - and all the treats just fall out! I'm so proud that she figured that out, and so quickly, and yet so disappointed that she cheated! 

Well we've had our longest day. The nights are fair drawin in. Lol

Mistakes are made for moving on.

Surgery

 

Well that's it. No turning back. Surgery is complete. I suggested a mini bypass to the man in a white coat and he said 'yes, we will do mini, it is better for older people' - the cheek! After the op another doctor came to see me and told me the mini bypass had gone well and they fixed a hiatus hernia - I had a hernia? News to me, but explains why I had been getting a lot of heartburn recently. Thank you very much, and for free too! 

I really felt ok afterwards. Tired, obviously. Uncomfortable, a bit. But I can't say I was ever in much pain. I thought you might like to see my plasters. As proof so to speak lol. But that was the easy bit, now I need to work hard. Firstly getting back on to normal food, sticking to all the rules (and there are a lot of rules - chew food really well, have only small bites, eat very slowly (20-30 minutes per meal), keep fat intake below 3% and sugar below 5%, careful with alcohol as you feel inebriated faster, never have bubbles (in the bath, yes. In a drink, no - though I think the odd tonic in a gin might be ok)). Day 1 was sips of water, days 2&3 we got 4x actimel, day 4,5,6,7 plain yogurt, protein shakes and fresh fruit juice diluted with water. Today is day 5! 

The photo of the colourful bear is Billy Hope. A gift from my in laws. They had been on Dragons Den, different coloured bears for different emotions. Hope was for me, hope I get all my dreams answered. He didn't like the journey, squeezed in my bag but he chatted up all the nurses.

I'd like to thank you so very much for all your messages and likes. It's been amazing and I appreciate every one.

I got home around midnight Wednesday. So nice to be in my own bed. Unfortunately I woke to some sad news. Those who have been reading this for a while will remember George, Libby's best mate next door. He was put to sleep yesterday morning. I was so grateful that I got to say goodbye. He was just a big hairy teddy bear and was brought up with Libby. Born just days apart and played together since puppies. Bless him. He's playing with Libby again now I suspect.

Kindness is one thing you can't give away, it always comes back.

George and Libby both 2014 - 2023

Countdown

 

So my weight this morning is 15st 8½. Should be the last time I see that. And this is the way I look ... Not for long though. I've lost 12lbs in 1½ weeks. Wow! 

My week? Has been mental. Firstly let's go back to the menopause. Quick recap - no period 12 months (yay the menopause), new HRT, evil monster, ditch new HRT after 2 weeks, horrible period (ok I get this). Then this week I had another period. So what, I'm now back to peri-menopausal? And boy, did it come with a big dose of PMT! Just rotten. I was weepy and miserable and paranoid. Luckily, feeling better now.

Secondly, I'm having major surgery in 3 days, yikes! It really is going to happen. My life is just about to change forever. FOREVER! 

This week the diet has been ok. Monday I didn't even eat my full quota. Wednesday I was a bit fed up of it. What? Salad again? Save me from the salad! Grocery shopping yesterday and I really, really wanted to buy some yummy biscuits. And I mean I really wanted some. I figured one biscuit would not be the end of the world right? And I honestly don't think it would have been a massive deal. But I still didn't buy any. Something inside just stopped me. The old Gilly was fighting the new, and the new Gilly won. I bought some delicious raspberries instead. Now I'm not saying everything will be perfect. I'm going to fall down the rabbit hole on occasions. I wouldn't be human (or fat) if I didn't. The difference will be that this tool, this enormous thing I'm undertaking, will help me climb back out again. Bring it on!

So I leave home Saturday to get the train to Edinburgh. I fly to Latvia 8am Sunday, landing at 12:40. I will be collected and taken to the hotel. Monday I'm taken to the clinic. I'll have my pre op and then later my surgery. And I fly back to Aberdeen via Amsterdam on Wednesday. Getting in quite late. I'll then probably sleep all day Thursday. Bingo. 

I thought it was time for another poem. I hope you like it.

Healthy is an outfit that looks different on everybody.

Does our weight define us

It's something we all carry

For most it's not considered

But for me it is my quarry

I see it in the mirror

And hide it right away

Something I must tackle

But maybe another day

Your weight is on your body

Mine is mostly in my head

I'm not saying it's imaginary

But in my mind it has imbed 

Stepping onto scales

Is what I dearly hate

A constant harsh reminder

Of what went on my plate

I can't just go cold turkey

And decide I will not eat

Food is part of life no less

It keeps my heart a-beat

Obesity they call it

I like to call it fat

Eat less and move more

You'll lose it just like that!

Being fat is all consuming

Something I can't ignore

I feel so melancholic

My figure I do abhor

That day is now upon me

My weight I will now tackle

I'm worn out and fed up 

My size is such a battle

I've given up on diets

They are evil I believe

Instead I'm off to Latvia

To have a gastric sleeve

LRD

I forgot to weigh myself before holidays but I've been sitting at 16st 1lb for ages. After my holidays I was 16st 6½lb - nothing new there then. 

So I was straight on to the Liver Reduction Diet. Even though I had decided on the real food, I almost switched to milk (4 pints a day, with sugar free jelly and a drink of Bovril) I figured if calves can do it so can I (am I comparing myself to a baby cow - probably) but went back to real food, and it's been fine. Breakfast - slice of toast with 2 scrambled eggs, Lunch - tuna salad, portion of fruit, half pitta bread, Supper - 125g mash, small chicken breast (100g), low carb veg, Muller light yogurt, piece of fruit. I've lost 7lbs in the first 3 days. Now if any one is now thinking why don't I just do this and lose weight - shame on you lol. As I've said a hundred times it's not the losing, it's the keeping it off. It's borderline impossible! Anyway, I'm hungry but I'm coping just dandy.

Talking with my daughter the other day about exercise I told her that I was having an operation on my stomach not my brain, I wasn't going to wake up a gym bunny! She argued that I certainly would! But the more I've thought about it the more I realise she actually has a point. My stomach, and then my whole body will be changing. I need to ensure that my brain (thoughts, feelings, habits) changes too. If not, I risk the the procedure being a very expensive mistake. I can do this. I already feel different. I'm reading everything I can. I'm on a WhatsApp group with fellow chunkies who are having the surgery this month (3 of which at the same time as me - even figured out who I'll probably be sharing a room with) and the chat and info has been priceless.

It was my birthday when I was away so we celebrated in a nice Italian restaurant (as you do when in Turkey). I ordered this starter (pictured) not because I thought I'd like it, just because it sounded awesome - salted sea bass, red pepper avocado, shrimp, quails egg, salmon caviar, beetroot foam. Wow, and yeah it wasn't very nice lol. But I know someone who would have loved it! 

Be there for others, but never leave yourself behind.