Flowers

Quick cough update - the antibiotics cleared the chest infection but I still have upper respiratory crackles. No meds can help, just time. Though I do hope it would hurry up as I'm still fed up now. It's constant coughing with a lovely wheeze it keep it interesting. 

Yesterday was my wedding anniversary - 27 years! Mark bought be some beautiful flowers made more special because he doesn't buy me flowers very often. The years have flown by and I think we are very lucky to have each other, even though we can fight, but that's part of the parcel. 

We had our first viewing booked for tomorrow but they have cancelled, which is upsetting. They cited the SSEN substation which is currently being built in Longside. The reality is that we'll barely see it from our house and we won't be affected but it's close enough to worry perspective buyers. I think it's going to throw a lot of people and with other houses being for sale then they have lots of options. I need to rethink how I can make my future and my family's future work for us. My desire to be close to my mum is visceral. I need to be near her for the last year's of her life. I need to make sure she's ok. Healthy and happy. I just want to be able to pop in for coffee a few times a week. I don't want her lonely. She, hopefully, has plenty of years ahead but everyone's years are finite. Not one of us has a look into the decades ahead and we just have to do what we have to do. I love my house and I love living in Scotland but I need to move and I'm worried that isn't going to happen. If we can make it work how much of a compromise will it be. How much driving up and down will I be doing and how sustainable will it be. And at what cost? Financially, emotionally and to Mark and the kids? A few have asked why mum doesn't move to Scotland. That will not happen as mum has all her friends and family near her. I can't make her live closer to me and therefore away from her other daughter! That's barmy and not fair. It would also take her double distance away from her third daughter too. Not including her grandchildren and great grandchildren! No, I'm going to her. Ooh and don't think I'm forgetting my dad. I want to be closer to him too but he has a lovely wife that does a great job of looking after him so less for me to worry about. My mum is all alone. We'll figure it out. For most people when their house is on the market they sit and wait. If it sells they move, if it doesn't sell they don't move. Literally that simple but of course not for me. My tenant in Newcastle moves out in less than 3 weeks. Isaac and I were moving in and I was going to live there, and travel up to Scotland. Maybe lose my job only to be back in Scotland full time in a few months. Do we go ahead? What about Isaac's job if we never sell because at some point I'll stop driving up and down. What does he do? Come back too? Or do I live in Scotland and drive down the road for the odd week or so instead? Do we sell the house in Newcastle straight away? Do we renovate the house in Newcastle to sell it? Does Mark move with us? Do we leave Scotland empty? Do I just stay with mum? Does Isaac want to live there even if we are up here? Yes, all of this and more is constantly going on in my head and it's not fun. I tell you what would help - winning the bloody lottery!!

Anyway, have a great week and I'll speak to you again soon.

Forget the mistakes, remember the lesson.

What's wrong with Gilly?

What's wrong with me? I'm still coughing and I'm seeing the doctor again this afternoon. Just need something to knock it on the head. It's been 4 weeks now which is not fun! Fingers crossed. Oh, and my back has gone into spasm! Ouch, so sore.

Anything else wrong with me? Yes, lots. Rather than complain about the obvious - loose skin, flabby belly (I bet all women and most men dislike their tummy's) aches and pains due to getting older and wrinkles & grey hair - I'm going to talk about some that are more unique to me. 

1. My feet. Most people have big toes that come straight out of the end of their feet. Not me. My big toes bend towards my other toes, making a pointy triangle shaped foot. Aesthetically it doesn't bother me but it causes jutting bones at the bottom of the toe, which is probably a bunion! That's not so great. 

2. My eyebrows. I have the 'Kerr' eyebrow, the same as my dad, uncle and granddad. The boys have long bushy eyebrows that make a bold statement, but not so lady like for a girl. I have to trim them with scissors and if I forget I can grow an eyebrow hair to more than an inch long! I'm not kidding! 

3. My hands. They give away my age. I don't like my fingers and the skin is wrinkly, with sun spots. When I look at my hands I see my mum's hands and my grandma's were also exactly the same. I don't like to think of myself as old, so looking at my hands is not pleasant for me. A reminder I'm getting on.

We've had a lovely week at Forest Holidays near Peebles. The lodge is gorgeous and comfy, the hot tub is relaxing, and the forest is quiet and calming. Bella is with us and she loves it, and Ellie has joined us this time for her first forest retreat. On Wednesday night we did the pub quiz, and we won! Well, jointly won. It went to a tie breaker and we lost. Pipped at the post! Gutting but there you go. Missed out on the prize - Ellie really wanted the forest teddy. Lol. Then last night me and Ellie went to bingo! Really not my thing but I didn't want to let her go alone bless. I was dragged, but it was ok. When we arrived we found out it had been cancelled! Yay. Instead, we sat outside and had a cocktail in the early evening sunshine. Heaven. 

Have a great weekend everyone. 

Of course I talk to myself, sometimes I need expert advice.

My good taste in crockery

So not only does Alan Titchmarsh have my mugs but Elizabeth Darcy (nee Bennet) has my tea set at Pemberley. This is a screenshot from the BBC series The Other Bennet Sister. I so love it, it was my grandma's and I'm so chuffed to see it on TV.

My cough has not abated and I've been given antibiotics from the doctor. They've not kicked in yet but hopefully by the end of today I'll be feeling better! Though it's not all bad news as I've lost a couple of pounds, coughed them off my bum I recon. Just another 3lbs and I'll be in the 9st bracket which would be amazing. 

The Scottish parliament elections are on their way. As you can imagine this has made my husband very happy, not. He's so pissed off with the government and politics in general that there's an awful lot of swearing in my house. He's even considering not voting because he believes they are all crooks. But enough about that, I try to avoid any controversial topics on this blog. I just thought I'd throw it in there - it'll make my brother in law smile at least. 

I've had such an uneventful week that I've got little to talk about. It's been all negatives. Missed my nephew's birthday because of this cough. Missed a day at work because of this cough. Couldn't give blood because of the antibiotics. Been fed up and miserable because of this cough. We're going out for lunch today - the Sherlock Holmes themed Six at Nico and then a night over in Aberdeen. Mark was threatening to cancel it... Because of this cough but it was too late to get our money back so we're still going! Pray that I don't keel over and we should have an ok time. 

Well on that note it's time to say a depressing farewell. I hope your week has been better than mine. Next week I'll have more to say - I promise. Bye for now x

If you want to fly, you have to give up what weighs you down.

Pest of a cough

Bella's made herself at home! 

I've had a hacking cough for over a week! This has been exhausting! Not only because the constant coughing takes it's toll and hurts your tummy muscles, but it also keeps you awake at night so doubly tiring. As I'm sure you know I'm an advocator of chocolate to sooth the throat. It's like honey but thicker and therefore hangs around the tickle for longer. Just long enough to hopefully fall asleep. Now, this is not good for your teeth when using it during the night - but it works so I do it, then brush my teeth extra well in the morning. I've got through 2 Easter eggs just by trying to calm the rough and sore throat! I almost lost my voice too, sounding very husky! But luckily for everyone here I was still able to communicate. I always have so much to say, not being able to speak would be a nightmare! 

Now I am not confirming if this is linked but one of the Karen's called me a grumpy cow last night! Lol. Yes I am, I definitely am. I can have a short fuse at times and as I've got older I bite my tongue less and less. I tend to just say it how I see it. Don't worry, she doesn't bear grudges... As far as I know. I've only known her 40 odd years so it's a new relationship! I'll keep you posted. 

I've been looking at show homes. Not that I particularly want to live in a new house on an estate but I do love a good show home! I have seen some nice ones, and I like looking for home design ideas, finding things that I really like and things that I really don't. The biggest problem with this type of new build is that the rooms are so small. They look lovely, until you realise the bedroom has no wardrobes and nowhere to put wardrobes. The garage wouldn't really fit a car, certainly not a larger vehicle! And it's a good job that TVs now go up on walls! One master bedroom did have a fitted wardrobe however you couldn't open the door because the bedside table was in the way. Just crazy man! And, they are built so close together. No privacy in the gardens, no naked sunbathing like I do at the moment lol. And no belting arguements with the hubby without the whole street knowing what he's done wrong, again!! 

I'm back up north tomorrow. I've missed Mark and the kids. I've missed my home and my friends. I've even missed being in the office and the Home in general. And as soon as I'm up the road I'll miss my mum and family and friends down here! Such is life, we make the most of what we have and make changes when we can. Life is good and we must live it the best way we can. Tell someone you love them today. I love that you've just read this again this week. Thank you.

Being an adult is like folding a fitted sheet, no one really knows how to do it. 

Aging

My lovely walk with Bella on Thursday morning. Didn't really know where I was walking, but I didn't get lost and it was so pretty. Gorgeous sunny day too.

I've started to notice a few signs that I'm getting on in years. Don't get me wrong, getting old is a privilege and I'm not exactly complaining, but I thought I'd share my observations. 

Ellie and I went to Charity disco on Friday through my work. I wore by comfy flat velvet pumps and Ellie wore great high heels! 

I really enjoy Alan Titchmarsh on a Sunday morning, especially the Walk on the Wild Side (pictures of nature and animals that viewers have sent in). I love his mugs on the show AND I have those very mugs AND they are my favourite mugs! 

I will always pick comfy clothes - although sloppy outfits seems to be in vogue, so maybe I am just fashionable at last?

Long gone are the sexy underwear. Stockings and suspenders are a thing of the past, no thank you! Give me cotton knickers every time! 

Instead of turning the music up I'm turning it down. If I'm driving I turn it down when I need to concentrate, I think I can see better if I don't have it blaring! 

All the young doctors, dentists, vets, police officers just look like teenagers! Surely not old enough for that job!? I remember my grandma making similar comments when I was a kid. Now I'm doing it! Argh. 

I love staying home. I can't think of anything worse than going to a nightclub, heavens forbid! Soft slippers after a hot bath is where my heart lies. I still love dancing, but in the kitchen not a dance floor. Though you should have seen me giving is large at the disco on Friday! Dance like no one is watching is my message. And I'm far too old to give a monkeys about what others think! Shake that booty and wave those arms. Maybe I'm not as past it as I thought??

I'm down in Newcastle staying with mum. Working from home and having a bit of a trial run for when I move, which will be sooner than I thought - fingers crossed! So far so good. It's home, and it feels so good. Though Scotland is my second home and will be missed. 

Have a great Easter. Eat lots of chocolate eggs and hot cross buns! It's the start of three warmer and longer days. Enjoy xx

Age is something that doesn't matter unless you are cheese.