Tetchy

Weight today : bugger forgot but about 14 7 😢😢

So I really shouted at my hubby the other day! Now I need to tell you the background first (not excuses. I don't need to provide excuses - he just really annoyed me). But I did have rotten PMT, I had just stepped on the scales for the first time in a few weeks, after having a few days away. I also put my newly washed jeans on and they were proper tight. So Gilly wasn't particularly happy. When I mentioned the tight jeans he told me that's what to expect when I have a diet of biscuits after breakfast (one small biscuit with my 10am coffee) (ok, I had just had breakfast 10 mins earlier). Now husband is thin. He's fit and he's slim. He's the same size he was aged 16 years old! He has never ever been overweight. He has never ever even had to sniff at a diet. He has never considered what he eats, and eats as he pleases. I, on the other hand, have been trying to lose weight for half of my life! I have lost count how many times I've started a diet. I think of food and what I should or shouldn't eat all day every day. I know about how (and how not) to lose weight. So his response on Sunday morning was not appreciated. It's like those people who tell you how to raise your children - even when they don't have any kids themselves!! Really really annoying! Like don't tell your grandmother how to suck eggs!

I took a friend to hospital to get scan results. The consultant (like all doctors) asked about how much she smoked, how much she drank, and how much she ate. The Dr said that when she drinks along with her partner to remember that men metabolise alcohol quicker and better than woman. And that the drink is harming her 3 times more than him! That's food for thought. When I drink it's usually with hubby and I drink the same as him. I need to think of this a little more.

So my plan was to jump back on the Fast 800 plan this week. I was disappointed with my gain, though not surprised (obviously) and I do need/want to lose weight. But like all great plans it fell on the first hurdle - Saturday morning! It's tricky isn't it? I am fed up of dieting and being worried about what I eat! But I'm also so unhappy with the way I look - aka fat! Am I really destined to be doing this dieting thing for the next 30 years? Who the hell can be bothered with that??

You may not like what you see in the mirror, but there is no point arguing with your reflection.